--- product_id: 16996275 title: "Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?" price: "€ 22.76" currency: EUR in_stock: true reviews_count: 13 url: https://www.desertcart.hr/products/16996275-sacred-marriage-what-if-god-designed-marriage-to-make-us store_origin: HR region: Croatia --- # Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? **Price:** € 22.76 **Availability:** ✅ In Stock ## Quick Answers - **What is this?** Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? - **How much does it cost?** € 22.76 with free shipping - **Is it available?** Yes, in stock and ready to ship - **Where can I buy it?** [www.desertcart.hr](https://www.desertcart.hr/products/16996275-sacred-marriage-what-if-god-designed-marriage-to-make-us) ## Best For - Customers looking for quality international products ## Why This Product - Free international shipping included - Worldwide delivery with tracking - 15-day hassle-free returns ## Description What if God designed marriage to make you holy instead of happy? What if your relationship isn't as much about you and your spouse as it is about you and God? In Sacred Marriage , bestselling author Gary Thomas uncovers the ways that your marriage can become a doorway to a closer walk with God and with each other. Join over one million others who have already uncovered Thomas's tips for fostering a sacred marriage. Within the pages of Sacred Marriage , Thomas invites you to see how God can use your relationship with your spouse as a discipline and a motivation to love God more and reflect more of the character of his Son. In addition to life-changing insights from Scripture, church history, and time-tested wisdom from Christian classics, you'll find practical advice and techniques to make your marriage happier by becoming holier husbands and wives. In Sacred Marriage , Thomas will give you all of the tools you need to: Turn marital struggles into spiritual and personal appreciation Love your spouse with a stronger sense of purpose Confront your weaknesses and sin in order to grow your relationship with God and with your spouse Partner in the spiritual growth and character formation of your spouse Transform a tired marriage into a relationship filled with awe and respect Thomas reveals that sacred marriages teach us to love God and others well by fostering a healthy sex life, a strong prayer life, and a rich spiritual life. God uses our marriages to help us grow in character, in prayer, in worship, and in service--we just have to recognize that the purpose of marriage is holiness, not happiness. Each copy also includes thought-provoking discussion questions designed to spark conversation between couples and small groups, allowing you to dive deeper into the lessons that Thomas shares in Sacred Marriage . Join the one million others who have already started on their journey to transforming their relationship with their spouses and with their Creator. Review: 5 Star Message - Husband and I *just finished reading Sacred Marriage together. We had a couple of complaints, but we both enjoyed the overall message. Our first complaint was the word choices. Because we were reading out loud, we frequently stumbled over the verbose language—many, many times. I don't know how much of an issue this would have been reading silently because maybe we would have just assumed we'd gotten the message where we said the wrong word out loud. I'm not sure. Maybe others didn't have this issue. It could be a matter of speech and the written word being so different. Our second complaint was that there was no discussion or thought questions to go with the chapter content. Well, that is until we got to the end of the book. Which we didn't know was even there since we were reading on our Kindles. Had we known there actually was a section dedicated to discussion questions at the back of the book, we probably would have made an effort to flip back and forth, but that also would have been annoying. I think it makes more sense to include these at the end of each chapter or section and if the reader wants to skip them then it's still easier to do so. Overall, we both appreciated the message of Sacred Marriage. The important takeaways for us both were that everything in our marriage can be used to draw us closer to God. We can use our spouse's failings to view them in comparison to God--He will never fail us. We can use those same failings to grow in our love--not a selfish love that always seeks to be fulfilled, but in a self-sacrificial love that always seeks to fulfill others. We can use our own failings to remind ourselves that just as we are human and imperfect, our spouse is the same. Just as we fail and fall short, our spouse does too. And just as much as we want forgiveness and a pardon for our mistakes, our spouse does too. We can use marriage as a refiner's fire to become more like God, to love more like God, and to forgive more like God. The author uses an example (and I'm totally paraphrasing the story) of a time when his wife wasn't doing something that he wanted her to do. I can't remember what the task was so let's say it's to make the bed. And she repeatedly doesn't do this task. He gets so annoyed. One day she tells him that she's going to love him forever, and he frustratedly responds that he doesn't need her to love him forever, he needs her to love him for twenty-seven seconds. Twenty-seven seconds is all the time it takes to do the task she daily neglects to do. And she basically tells him that maybe he needs to love her for the twenty-seven seconds it takes him to do the task himself. I loved this example. So often we latch onto these little things that our spouse isn't doing, and we think to ourselves "If he/she loved me they would do this" or "he/she isn't thinking about me at all at this moment that they choose not to do/to do this task". When in reality, we're also stuck in the moment of thinking about ourselves and not just doing whatever the task is ourselves. Many times, the task only takes us twenty-seven seconds, or thereabout. We can't keep score in our marriage. Doing so helps no one and hurts everyone. Here are too many of my favorite quotes: -...in one sense, marriage might be the toughest ministry she could ever undertake. "The state of marriage is one that requires more virtue and constancy than any other," he wrote. "It is a perpetual exercise of mortification..." -To spiritually benefit from marriage, we have to be honest. We have to look at our disappointments, own up to our ugly attitudes, and confront our selfishness. -Who can be truly "happy" while filled with anger, rage, and malice? Who can be happy while nursing resentment or envy? Who can be honestly happy while caught in a sticky compulsion of an insatiable lust or incessant materialism? The glutton may enjoy his food, but he does not enjoy his condition. -You won't find happiness at the end of a road named selfishness. -I also pray it will help you to love your marriage more, appreciate your marriage more, and inspire you to become even more engaged in your relationship with your spouse. When you realize something is "sacred," far from making it boring, it gives birth to a new reverence, a take-your-breath-away realization that something you may have been taking for granted is far more profound, far more life-giving and life-transforming, than you may have ever realized. I love marriage, and I love my marriage. I love the fun parts, the easy parts, and the pleasurable parts, but also the difficult parts--the parts that frustrate me but help me understand myself and my spouse on a deeper level; the parts that are painful but that crucify the aspects of me that I hate; the parts that force me to my knees and teach me that I need to learn to love with God's love instead of just trying harder. Marriage has led me to deeper levels of understanding, more pronounced worship, and a sense of fellowship that I never knew existed. -God didn't design marriage to compete with himself but to point us to himself. -Honor not expressed is not honor. -Contempt is born when we fixate on our spouse's weaknesses. Every spouse has these sore points. If you want to find them, without a doubt you will. If you want to obsess about them, they will grow--but you won't. -Couples don't fall out of love so much as they fall out of repentance. -God doesn't protect Christians from their problems--he helps them walk victoriously through their problems. -When we're most tired, most worn-out, and feeling more sorry for ourselves than we ever have before, we have the opportunity to confront feelings of self-pity by getting up and serving our mate. -"Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power" (John 13:3), but instead of acting like a spiteful tyrant, Jesus got up from the meal and washed his disciples' feet. Instead of using his power to pout, chastise, or gloat, Jesus uses it to serve. -But when we have power over another--particularly power in an area where someone feels so vulnerable and needy and where they can go nowhere else to be served--and then use that power irresponsibly, inappropriately, and maliciously, we become more like Satan, who loves to manipulate us in our weakness rather than like God, who serves us in our weakness. -And yet, as we travel into marriage, there usually comes a moment when we wonder, "Is this really as good as it gets? Is this really all there is?" Instead of being turned away from our spouse when this disillusionment sets in, we can be turned toward God. It can remind us that even our best choice of a human partner isn't enough to satisfy us. It won't help us to change our emotional focus, recognizing we can never receive all the love we need and desire from fellow humans. Instead of realizing that our true needs can be ultimately met only in and by God, some people keep trying to find their fulfillment in new relationships, thinking that what they really need is just to find "the right person," which, when translated, usually means a new person. Christianity does not direct us to focus on finding the right person; it calls us to become the right person. Our happiness is not determined by what is around us, but rather by how we deal with what is around us. -We allow marriage to point beyond itself when we accept two central missions: becoming the people God created us to be, and doing the work God has given us to do. If we embrace--not just accept, but actively embrace--these two missions, we will have a full life, a rich life, a meaningful life, and a successful life. The irony is, we will probably also have a happy marriage, but that will come as a blessed by-product of putting everything else in order. Gary Thomas tells you the hard truths that you need to hear but you might not accept if they were coming from someone you knew. The distance of someone not intimately involved in your marriage helps you to see that this person is impartial with their advice and knowledge. Gary Thomas isn't attacking you, your flaws, your spouse, their flaws, or your relationship with God. He is simply presenting the information you most need to hear. And I highly suggest reading this with your partner as reading it first and then trying to share the information with them might come off as preachy. Yet, I know that not all spouses are interested in reading this kind of content or even in improving themselves or their marriage. If that's the case, then read this alone and put into practice all that you can on your side. Sacred Marriage's message was enough to give this book 5 Stars. The mirror it placed in front of me to confront my own selfishness and self-centeredness that isn't Christ-like and won't serve my marriage is enough to deserve the rating. I do think the vocabulary used and sentence structure was a bit much. It tripped both my husband and myself up many times. And I hope if they revise this book that the discussion questions will be included at the end of each chapter versus the end of the book. Have you read Sacred Marriage? What did you think? Let me know! *Finished this book and wrote this review back in February 2023, but review is just now going up due to scheduling. Review: Highly recommend this to all ages and ones who want to better their marriage! - I absolutely highly recommend this book to every couple looking to better their marriage together as a Christian couple newly married and ones who have been together for 8 years 20 30 40 50+ years and newly weds and soon to be married as well. New to the faith still a good book and devotion to get!! I recommend the devotion for this book and loving him well together to help with your marriage and intimacy and relationship with God and how you view marriage and your spouse! ## Features - Super - Christian Living - Primary - Relationships - Sub - Love and Marriage - Author - Thomas Gary L - Publisher - Zondervan ## Technical Specifications | Specification | Value | |---------------|-------| | Best Sellers Rank | #2,374 in Books ( See Top 100 in Books ) #6 in Christian Marriage (Books) #8 in Marriage #11 in Christian Family & Relationships | | Customer Reviews | 4.7 out of 5 stars 4,815 Reviews | ## Images ![Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? - Image 1](https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/81KvV1gdqNL.jpg) ## Customer Reviews ### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5 Star Message *by S***R on August 8, 2023* Husband and I *just finished reading Sacred Marriage together. We had a couple of complaints, but we both enjoyed the overall message. Our first complaint was the word choices. Because we were reading out loud, we frequently stumbled over the verbose language—many, many times. I don't know how much of an issue this would have been reading silently because maybe we would have just assumed we'd gotten the message where we said the wrong word out loud. I'm not sure. Maybe others didn't have this issue. It could be a matter of speech and the written word being so different. Our second complaint was that there was no discussion or thought questions to go with the chapter content. Well, that is until we got to the end of the book. Which we didn't know was even there since we were reading on our Kindles. Had we known there actually was a section dedicated to discussion questions at the back of the book, we probably would have made an effort to flip back and forth, but that also would have been annoying. I think it makes more sense to include these at the end of each chapter or section and if the reader wants to skip them then it's still easier to do so. Overall, we both appreciated the message of Sacred Marriage. The important takeaways for us both were that everything in our marriage can be used to draw us closer to God. We can use our spouse's failings to view them in comparison to God--He will never fail us. We can use those same failings to grow in our love--not a selfish love that always seeks to be fulfilled, but in a self-sacrificial love that always seeks to fulfill others. We can use our own failings to remind ourselves that just as we are human and imperfect, our spouse is the same. Just as we fail and fall short, our spouse does too. And just as much as we want forgiveness and a pardon for our mistakes, our spouse does too. We can use marriage as a refiner's fire to become more like God, to love more like God, and to forgive more like God. The author uses an example (and I'm totally paraphrasing the story) of a time when his wife wasn't doing something that he wanted her to do. I can't remember what the task was so let's say it's to make the bed. And she repeatedly doesn't do this task. He gets so annoyed. One day she tells him that she's going to love him forever, and he frustratedly responds that he doesn't need her to love him forever, he needs her to love him for twenty-seven seconds. Twenty-seven seconds is all the time it takes to do the task she daily neglects to do. And she basically tells him that maybe he needs to love her for the twenty-seven seconds it takes him to do the task himself. I loved this example. So often we latch onto these little things that our spouse isn't doing, and we think to ourselves "If he/she loved me they would do this" or "he/she isn't thinking about me at all at this moment that they choose not to do/to do this task". When in reality, we're also stuck in the moment of thinking about ourselves and not just doing whatever the task is ourselves. Many times, the task only takes us twenty-seven seconds, or thereabout. We can't keep score in our marriage. Doing so helps no one and hurts everyone. Here are too many of my favorite quotes: -...in one sense, marriage might be the toughest ministry she could ever undertake. "The state of marriage is one that requires more virtue and constancy than any other," he wrote. "It is a perpetual exercise of mortification..." -To spiritually benefit from marriage, we have to be honest. We have to look at our disappointments, own up to our ugly attitudes, and confront our selfishness. -Who can be truly "happy" while filled with anger, rage, and malice? Who can be happy while nursing resentment or envy? Who can be honestly happy while caught in a sticky compulsion of an insatiable lust or incessant materialism? The glutton may enjoy his food, but he does not enjoy his condition. -You won't find happiness at the end of a road named selfishness. -I also pray it will help you to love your marriage more, appreciate your marriage more, and inspire you to become even more engaged in your relationship with your spouse. When you realize something is "sacred," far from making it boring, it gives birth to a new reverence, a take-your-breath-away realization that something you may have been taking for granted is far more profound, far more life-giving and life-transforming, than you may have ever realized. I love marriage, and I love my marriage. I love the fun parts, the easy parts, and the pleasurable parts, but also the difficult parts--the parts that frustrate me but help me understand myself and my spouse on a deeper level; the parts that are painful but that crucify the aspects of me that I hate; the parts that force me to my knees and teach me that I need to learn to love with God's love instead of just trying harder. Marriage has led me to deeper levels of understanding, more pronounced worship, and a sense of fellowship that I never knew existed. -God didn't design marriage to compete with himself but to point us to himself. -Honor not expressed is not honor. -Contempt is born when we fixate on our spouse's weaknesses. Every spouse has these sore points. If you want to find them, without a doubt you will. If you want to obsess about them, they will grow--but you won't. -Couples don't fall out of love so much as they fall out of repentance. -God doesn't protect Christians from their problems--he helps them walk victoriously through their problems. -When we're most tired, most worn-out, and feeling more sorry for ourselves than we ever have before, we have the opportunity to confront feelings of self-pity by getting up and serving our mate. -"Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power" (John 13:3), but instead of acting like a spiteful tyrant, Jesus got up from the meal and washed his disciples' feet. Instead of using his power to pout, chastise, or gloat, Jesus uses it to serve. -But when we have power over another--particularly power in an area where someone feels so vulnerable and needy and where they can go nowhere else to be served--and then use that power irresponsibly, inappropriately, and maliciously, we become more like Satan, who loves to manipulate us in our weakness rather than like God, who serves us in our weakness. -And yet, as we travel into marriage, there usually comes a moment when we wonder, "Is this really as good as it gets? Is this really all there is?" Instead of being turned away from our spouse when this disillusionment sets in, we can be turned toward God. It can remind us that even our best choice of a human partner isn't enough to satisfy us. It won't help us to change our emotional focus, recognizing we can never receive all the love we need and desire from fellow humans. Instead of realizing that our true needs can be ultimately met only in and by God, some people keep trying to find their fulfillment in new relationships, thinking that what they really need is just to find "the right person," which, when translated, usually means a new person. Christianity does not direct us to focus on finding the right person; it calls us to become the right person. Our happiness is not determined by what is around us, but rather by how we deal with what is around us. -We allow marriage to point beyond itself when we accept two central missions: becoming the people God created us to be, and doing the work God has given us to do. If we embrace--not just accept, but actively embrace--these two missions, we will have a full life, a rich life, a meaningful life, and a successful life. The irony is, we will probably also have a happy marriage, but that will come as a blessed by-product of putting everything else in order. Gary Thomas tells you the hard truths that you need to hear but you might not accept if they were coming from someone you knew. The distance of someone not intimately involved in your marriage helps you to see that this person is impartial with their advice and knowledge. Gary Thomas isn't attacking you, your flaws, your spouse, their flaws, or your relationship with God. He is simply presenting the information you most need to hear. And I highly suggest reading this with your partner as reading it first and then trying to share the information with them might come off as preachy. Yet, I know that not all spouses are interested in reading this kind of content or even in improving themselves or their marriage. If that's the case, then read this alone and put into practice all that you can on your side. Sacred Marriage's message was enough to give this book 5 Stars. The mirror it placed in front of me to confront my own selfishness and self-centeredness that isn't Christ-like and won't serve my marriage is enough to deserve the rating. I do think the vocabulary used and sentence structure was a bit much. It tripped both my husband and myself up many times. And I hope if they revise this book that the discussion questions will be included at the end of each chapter versus the end of the book. Have you read Sacred Marriage? What did you think? Let me know! *Finished this book and wrote this review back in February 2023, but review is just now going up due to scheduling. ### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Highly recommend this to all ages and ones who want to better their marriage! *by T***N on November 17, 2025* I absolutely highly recommend this book to every couple looking to better their marriage together as a Christian couple newly married and ones who have been together for 8 years 20 30 40 50+ years and newly weds and soon to be married as well. New to the faith still a good book and devotion to get!! I recommend the devotion for this book and loving him well together to help with your marriage and intimacy and relationship with God and how you view marriage and your spouse! ### ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ A User's Guide to Christian Marriage *by M***Y on August 27, 2006* I cannot begin to praise this book by Gary Thomas enough. As a minister, I officiate a lot of weddings and I can say without hesitation that I will strongly recommend this book to every couple I have contact with. SACRED MARRIEGE poses the question, "What if God designed marriage to make us Holy more than to make us happy?" Thomas then goes on to deftly and succinctly illustrate how marriage is intended to take us to levels of spirituality most people will never conceive of. Thomas breaks down many of the societal enigmas placed upon marriage. For example, throughout history, various religious doctrines have driven a massive and impenetrable wedge between spirituality and sexuality. Abstinence is believed by many, still today, to be the only true way to achieve maximum spirituality with God. Thomas accurately and completely destroys such apostasy by illustrating how marital sexuality can and should in fact, draw both partners deeper into their relationship with God. This book is also laden with practical examples that will make all husbands and wives ask simple questions that will immediately influence how they treat or react to their spouses. For example, in a section on cultivating gratitude, Thomas states, "I never eat at somebody's house without thanking them for providing a meal; why should I not give my wife the same thanks I'd give someone else?" A simple question which should provide a profound and immediate self-examination. There is also an adequate Notes section and also a very interesting section of questions for discussion and reflection. I believe this section, in and of itself, would make this a fantastic guide for young couples to help set the direction of their marriage and help initiate a habitual and constant inclusion of God in the marriage. I have read a lot of books on building and maintaining a successful marriage. A few of them have been extremely good; many have simply been cookie cutters of countless others. A few I would recommend; many, not so much. Without question, I give SACRED MARRIAGE by Gary Thomas my highest recommendation. This is a guidebook or user's manual, if you will, that will benefit all married couples, but this is essential reading for Christians seeking to take their marriage to its' highest level. Pastor Monty Rainey ## Frequently Bought Together - Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? - Devotions for a Sacred Marriage: A Year of Weekly Devotions for Couples (A 52-Week Devotional to Strengthen Your Relationship) - Sacred Marriage Bible Study Participant's Guide: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? --- ## Why Shop on Desertcart? - 🛒 **Trusted by 1.3+ Million Shoppers** — Serving international shoppers since 2016 - 🌍 **Shop Globally** — Access 737+ million products across 21 categories - 💰 **No Hidden Fees** — All customs, duties, and taxes included in the price - 🔄 **15-Day Free Returns** — Hassle-free returns (30 days for PRO members) - 🔒 **Secure Payments** — Trusted payment options with buyer protection - ⭐ **TrustPilot Rated 4.5/5** — Based on 8,000+ happy customer reviews **Shop now:** [https://www.desertcart.hr/products/16996275-sacred-marriage-what-if-god-designed-marriage-to-make-us](https://www.desertcart.hr/products/16996275-sacred-marriage-what-if-god-designed-marriage-to-make-us) --- *Product available on Desertcart Croatia* *Store origin: HR* *Last updated: 2026-05-16*