Gifted Grownups: The Mixed Blessings of Extraordinary Potential 1st Edition, Kindle Edition

For as long as I can remember, I've had an unusual need to learn, to think, and to have time to myself to go over my thoughts. As a child I was deemed "gifted" along with several others in my grade, but my "giftedness" never caused me any trouble until adolescence. I slowly became more and more isolated and alienated from my peers as our values and interests diverted further and further apart. I always excelled in school earning three bachelor's degrees all in hard sciences in five years of college, but I rarely found people who I felt "got" me. For years I struggled finding my place as most people just thought I was a weirdo, my family made fun of me for reading all the time, and coworkers and bosses sabotaged me when I outperformed them at work. The idea that I was "gifted" and that this was the cause to my problems fitting in in the world never crossed my mind until someone online recommended this book to me. As I read "Gifted Grownups," I continually mentally and verbally exclaimed "That's me!" I saw myself again and again in the portraits and anecdotes of other gifted individuals in the book, and there were times when it felt as if the author was writing specifically about me. Simply knowing there were other people like me and that I wasn't crazy or some kind of psychotic deviant gave me immense relief and made me feel no longer alone. Beyond that, "Gifted Grownups" helped me better understand myself, how other people view me, the mistakes I had made, and how to better strategize my life and behavior to be successful and contribute something to the world. After being sabotaged and treated poorly at several different jobs, I really struggled with nihilism and contemplated a lot of things, few of which were positive. This book continues to help me years after reading it the first time and is a reminder that there are people like me out there, that there is a place in the world for people like me, and that I mostly just need to be thoughtful and careful about what I say and who I "reveal" myself to. Law 1: Never outshine the master.Thank you, Marylou.

Excellent book. My response is both personal and professional. Yes some of the material is dated. But the discussion of what it is like to be gifted is spot on.Gifted adults are just gifted children who grew up.And that growing up process was often brutal.Let's try being despised by your classmates for setting the class curve? Anyone relish that idea? Even worse is the plight of the gifted child who asks so many deep and probing questions that they are at first ignored and later disliked by their teachers. Giftedness can be threatening to others who don't realize what a double edged sword it is. There can be bullying, sabotage, being overlooked, and just plain being screwed over in the gifted child's life.They can also not be diagnosed as gifted and helped to develop their potential in their earliest years.Boredom is a constant. And I do mean constant.There are categories and levels of giftedness. There is asychronous development. It may not sound that bad but it is extremely disconcerting. The child who has difficulty playing with other's because the details, that the gifted child adds to the games and the minutiae, are just too much for the others to deal with has it even harder as an adult who sounds like a smart ass due to incessant questioning and an often irritating to others habit of seeing all sides of things clearly.(Sorry for the run on sentences I think faster than I can punctuate).There is a tendency to see patterns and to categorize things into much more detailed and finely refined groups that is so strong that it can't be ignored because the mind is picking it up.As far as life achievement it just depends.It has to do with drive. How strong is the drive and is it internally based or mostly externally controlled?Many gifted grownups try very hard to just blend in: simplifying vocabulary, not answering questions aloud, not discussing pet subjects,keeping a low profile, and finding a partner who is able to tolerate the quirkiness.The partner may or may not be gifted. But they will certainly have a tolerance for quirkiness and a incongruous sense of humor.In my family I have seen gifted kids who are teacher pleasers who conform and overachieve.I have also seen the one's who eventhough they may be just as gifted maybe even more so couldn't give a rat's tail about conforming. The more independent thinkers are extraordinarily creative but ... they may be reviled instead of respected for it.I have seen the gifted who have learning disability issues and/or emotional problems.Hmm learning disability? Sometimes yes they are twice different and are gifted and have a learning disability or ADHD or are autistic.. But sometimes the gnawing grinding struggle of being bored to death is causing it. Daydreaming about more intriguing subjects can be seen as a focus problem. It can also be boredom. The constant never-ending boredom of knowing more than anyone else about subjects that are uncommon, maybe unpopular, and not able to be shared is abominable to live with.Gifted kids have discipline issues? Yeah right. Mostly they are miserable. School also can make them suddenly sleepy from the tediousness of trying to act interested enthusiastically in their course work which would require superb acting skills.They often hate school. They can be very misunderstood.There is additionally a stigma.After listening to stories ad nauseum about little Johnny singing the ABC song and learning to play in the mud - I have shared too. Stories of nieces and nephews who taught themselves to read by age 3 and had amazing recall of material. (Later, those family members continued to excel and did qualify as moderately to highly gifted on Intelligence Tests.) The response I have received has been outraged indignation and anger. They snarled at me "are they gifted?"By the time I became a parent I learned to just shut up and listen to what the other parents are saying.Some gifted kids don't test gifted. Not at first.They may deliberately not perform. I'm a strong proponent of taking the IQ Tests later in childhood.I also noticed that the more highly gifted don't revise and rewrite and rethink. Problem solving and understanding of information is understood in a detailed and deep level and the big picture is almost instantaneous. Sometimes the gifted think primarily in pictures. I've been told by some of them that they think in something similar to a video clip.Lastly The Gifted Grown Up works hard. It is difficult to fit in if you are different. It involves a lot of effort. Academia and Science are common fits for careers. Many of the college drop out dot.com multi-millionaires are gifted and creative, but your everyday totally average in job choice neighbor just might be gifted too.Although there are multiple intelligences having superb emotional intelligence, and being gifted at social skills and even at office politics is not necessarily a skill of many gifted adults. This may be one of the root causes of a spotty education and later a spotty career trajectory. There can be a lot of stops and starts and changes of direction for some gifted grown ups. But at the least gifted grownups see the humor in it and have the resilience and the intelligence to move on.

I would place this book evenly on par with Jacobsen's in terms of it being an EYE-OPENER if you are a gifted adult or suspect that you might be. This book will put your doubts to rest, one way or the other. Very well-written, I think it's better organized that Jacobsen's, and a bit easier to read. If I had to choose ONE of these two books to give a potential gifted adult, I think it would be this one.

As critics of this book have mentioned, the categorization of gifted adults in three categories is a bit reductive -- I myself don't fit squarely in any one category. That said, I found the book to be extraordinarily illuminating in terms of my turbulent path to find meaning and fulfillment in my career.I'd like to point out that the criticisms that the book is outdated are unfair. While the book was written in 1999, most of the theories and principles discussed here are still relevant. Furthermore, it's not the author's fault that no one has continued this important conversation.I highly recommend this book to individuals who work with gifted children and gifted adults who are working to make sense of why they are the way they are.

We have 3 very gifted grandchildren. This challenge is well handled by mrs. Streznewski with fine guidence.J BjerreDenmark

a detailed self help for unique children

Boring. Badly written