Ego vs. EQ

Amazing - nearly everyone has given this a 5-star review. I feel like a slacker putting up a 4-star review. And, gee... I thought the book was really good - now I feel like I have to say "what's wrong" since I'm not following the vast majority. Well.... very little is wrong. The book is a very well organized series of chapters giving instances of blind spots by senior executives that were blatant cases of where they were unable to be more self-aware and/or understanding of their impact on others. These blind spots either jettisoned people's jobs or gave them an opportunity to improve. The whole concept of the book is to recognize and improve on blind spots that you may have as a senior executive with ways to fix it.I felt the book was written either for CEOs or for people who lead teams of hundreds of people with multiple levels in a hierarchy; yet there are applications to mid-level managers - or even executives at a small company - you just have to dig a bit more. I think people who are very senior leaders could learn a lot from it. Shirkani recognizes that we all have our weak points; her examples are people that are likely to be far more insensitive than any of us reading it. She points out that changing behaviors is hard, but worth it, and why.OK, OK, so why not 5 stars. I like books written more from the positive perspective; such as here are what great leaders do - focusing on the really strong positive behaviors and using them to point out what to model. This book shows every chapter as an "ego trap" leading with one or multiple examples of a senior leader doing something very wrong and then pointing out we need to be careful not to do the same. There is a lot more space devoted to "what you might do wrong" then "what you might do right". Don't get me wrong; each of the chapters have great examples - it just left me feeling a bit beaten up instead of psyched to improve in places. So... if you're like me, and prefer seeing great examples of strong leadership - you'll find some - but they take a back seat to the failures to avoid.

The book is a must read in the study and understanding of Emotional Intelligence, (EQ) and the separation of EGO issues in corporate leader applications. The first tip that you need to read this book is a denial that you have any EGO issues and EQ is just another panacea. It is a very practical approach that goes beyond the theoretical explanation and conceptual analysis of EQ found in many other books. There is plenty of ‘analytical meat’ and great lessons in the "closer looks" following each of the anecdotes. An initial reading is a good read then, you then have a comparative base on what EQ is and how EQ can prevent typical EGO traps. If you have an executive team that includes those that struggle with their EGO, then this book is a great tool. Moreover, the book would make an excellent pre-read and discussion piece for seminars and training about the application and understanding of corporate or personal EGO vs. EQ in leadership. Straightforward, practical and filled with suggestions for application, the book is an easy read. It leaves you with substantial insights to Emotional Intelligence that can well stand to reform an overcharged or denial of EGO issues in a leadership position. Don't miss this one.

We’ve been talking about EQ for over a decade, and the term is hardwired now into many cultures and even our lives – yet to go from EQ Unaware to EQ Aware takes more than including the term in our lexicon. Most of us want to be sensitive to others, aware of our actions, and be willing to visit our Blindspots - yet finding out Blindspots is not intuitive. We tend to validate what we know and believe in - unless we are nudged to see beyond them. Jen Shirkani does a brilliant job of identifying the top 8 Blindspots she calls Ego Traps, and outlines what to do about them. Her approach is startlingly easy to digest – and amazingly aligned with the truth. I found myself reading this in two ways. One was to validate what I already knew was true (that is my ego speaking!) – but more importantly to see how much I had fallen into some of my own Ego Traps and been blind to them. A great personal and business resource!

As a psychologist, who works with many people the use of their emotional intelligence, I was pleased by the amount of necessary information within these pages. Referencing solid research studies, the author helps readers see the traps that many leaders fall into. She systematically lays out specific and informative steps to take, as well as good advice in recognizing patterns and changing behavior in order to achieve maximum cohesion and productivity within an organization. This book teaches and guides the use of your emotional brain power to respond rather than react to a situation and people within a group. It opens up the reader to true powerful possibilities of an emotionally intelligent leader. I highly recommend this book, and I will use it as a resource with my patients and friends! Also, a fairly quick read. It doesn't overburden the reader and gets right to the point. Loved it!

This is a book that has been begging to be written for a long time now. One of the joys of my Career progression has been watching the rise of something that I've believed since my 1st days of being in any kind of Leadership Role: That the best Leaders are the ones that take a Servant Leadership Approach and understand that a big part of making that work is being able to Empathize with the challenges and motivations of those that are reporting to you.Or more commonly now being referred to as people who have a "High EQ".Jen takes the reader through this approach as well as some of the potential obstacles and it should be on the shelf of anyone who is aspiring to be a more "Human" leader. Highly recommended.

Very interesting book and I thoroughly recommend it to any leadership and management trainer.

This is a rare gem. As a relatively new manager in the finance/accounting world, I found each of Jen's chapters engaging, digestible and very relevant. This isn't a long book, but it contains very memorable lessons to keep in mind as you move up through your career.