Gossip: Ten Pathways to Eliminate It from Your Life and Transform Your Soul

This is a wonderful book that really challenges one to think before they speak. It is an easy read with some very practical insight to why people gossip, how it hurts not only others but ourselves and how to avoid gossiping traps. I think this is a must read for all people and have recommended it to others I know who thrive on gossip.The one drawback that I see to this book is that sometimes there is a necessity to speak about others. For example, my 6 year old was being bullied at school and we needed to go to the school counselor to discuss the other child's actions and the impact on our child. At work, Managers discuss their direct reports with Senior Leaders of the organization. But what I walked away from this book with was to keep discussions in the proper context and with the proper people. It is also important to have a trusted sounding board be it a spouse, clergy, counselor, close friend whom you can share your feelings with. The problem is when you deviate outside that circle and share things for the sake of sharing.Also, I am not sure about telling "lies" to spare someone's feelings. If someone asks you "do I look fat in these pants" and you tell them they look beautiful when they don't so they go out in the pants feeling uncertain, they may not trust your judgement in the future. I would prefer someone to say, "well you are not fat but those pants aren't the most flattering".With all things there is a balance but I will say that to aspire to never gossip, to always think before you speak, to choose words of kindness and to avoid gossip pitfalls are the way go. I also loved the section on apologizing to God, to yourself and to others for gossiping. I would have liked to see more emphasis on self forgiveness. Let's face it, we all gossip, we are all going to continue to gossip at times and we need to feel a sense of forgiveness for ourselves so we can move forward and try to better the next time.I am so thankful I found and read this book. It will change how when and to whom I speak and what I say. I will think about the message in this book for a long time.

Seven years ago, I moved from a large city to a small resort town. Once I got there, I felt like I moved to "Peyton Place." Everyone was related to everybody either presently or in the past. I was an "outsider."I started my own business, got involved with professional alliances and organizations, together with social clubs i.e. yacht and sailing clubs, and always made time for philanthropic initiatives and church. I was "well-connected." I networked myself into knowing everyone and everyone knowing me.Unfortunately, to my chagrin I was getting to be known as a gossip or the town crier. At first I enjoyed all of the attention of everyone wanting to hear what I knew about someone or something. However, one day it came back and bit me in bum. I didn't learn from that one time and still repeated my behaviors. I finally realized that I wasn't only hurting those who I called "friends," but I was hurting myself. My word meant nothing.At that time, I wanted to make a conscious effort to change my life. Quite frankly, keeping up with the gossip was causing much chaos in my life. It was weighing me down and I wanted to be a better person. I began searching "gossip" on the internet. I found this book on amazon.com and ordered it immediately. When I got it, I read through it at that very moment.It was life altering. It changed my life. It changed my way of thinking. I realized some of the small things that I was doing were even hurtful and damaging.I also realized that I can single handedly stop others from telling me things they have no business telling me or anyone else. I feel like I am a better person for reading this book and people don't think of me as the person that they can get all of the "poop and scoop" from; but a well respected friend and confidant. I also realized that the people that listened and wanted to hear the "gossip" were really not my friends either.If you are looking for a way to stop listening and/or spreading gossip, and consciously want to make a change for the better, I suggest you get the book immediately. It has truly changed my life. I now have a group of friends that are near and dear to me. I would never betray their trust, nor would I say a bad thing about them or anyone anymore!!!Get the book . . . you will not regret it!!!

Ask someone what is the most pervasive harmful habit of mankind and he will probably answer drugs, smoking, alcohol, but he will certainly omit gossipThe Old Testament, (or the Five Books of Moses) expressly forbids gossip and considers it among the worst sins, because gossip leads to evil speech and through it the gossipmonger is harming a third party while he is not there, furthermore the listener is also considered an offender, because through listening he contributes to the spread of gossip, (..this is just one example of the many insights offered in this book..)The authors propose then ten effective pathways to avoid gossip, using Bible wisdom, universal quotes, elements of the Kabbalah (Jewish mysticism) as source and contemporary everyday "The Jonesses" stories as examples of how gossip harmfully interferes and distorts the course of events destroying reputations, lives, old friendships, and partnershipsAt the end, there is a useful summary of the gists of everyone of the chapters for practical everyday use.When you finish this "Avoid Gossip Handbook" you will conclude that gossip and evil hold hands and will think in advance many times before talking about other people businesses for the sake of speaking.