Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment Kindle Edition

Janet Heimlich attempts to expose not only how child abuse can occur within a religious household, school or place of worship, but also how religion itself can, under certain circumstances, be abusive itself. She acknowledges that religion can offer many spiritual, emotional and even physical benefits, ranging from a sense of peace brought by meditating or participating in worship to the sense of security and belonging that can come from being part of a faith community. But there can also be a dark side to religion, especially when faith communities keep to themselves, religious leaders are highly authoritarian, and God Himself is seen as a domineering, angry and vengeful deity bent on punishing wicked sinners.Ms. Heimlich attempts to explore four major areas of abuse within the three Abrahamic religions (Christianity, Judaism and Islam): physical abuse, emotional abuse, sexual abuse and medical neglect/abuse. She uses multiple examples from hundreds of different sources (the end notes take up over 60 pages) plus personal interviews.I'm afraid, however, that I don't share the other reviewers' enthusiasm for this book. It's not that I disagree with much of anything Ms. Heimlich says - in fact, I was already sold on the prevalence of religious-based child abuse before I ever read this book. The problem is that Ms. Heimlich just doesn't say it well. I'm already on her side, and I didn't find the book convincing - I'm sure that people who don't believe in (don't want to believe in) religion-based child abuse won't be convinced by this book.To begin with, I don't think that Ms. Heimlich is that great of a writer. Her writing is choppy and repetitive. She seems to be making the same basic points over and over, and just using dozens of examples to make such points. Such examples are more or less interesting and noteworthy, but, as the saying goes, "data" is not the plural of "anecdote". On the flip side, she doesn't really go into much detail on any one example. She gives brief details of an abusive situation, maybe a few comments from the victim, and then she breezes right on to the next example. If she's going to focus on anecdotes, it would be better to include fewer of them, but focus more in depth on each one. If the victims and the circumstances were better fleshed out, the reader would be better able to understand and empathize with the victim and his/her suffering. As it is, the anecdotes often seem a bit shallow and hard to connect with.Also, the book is so broad that almost by definition it can't be very deep. Ms. Heimlich is trying to cover all three major Abrahamic religions which represent a total of approximately 2.5 billion people. There are also broad divisions between various denominations and sects within each religion. Christianity includes Catholics, mainline Protestants, Evangelicals, Pentacostalists, Jehovah's Witnesses, Amish and Mennonites, Mormons, Fundamentalist Mormons and smaller sects and even cults. Within Christianity there is even debate as to whether or not some of these groups actually are "Christian". Therefore, there's very little that can be generalized across even one religion, let alone all three.Add to the broad religious focus the broad focus on abuse and the book gets so muddled as to be almost unwieldy. Ms. Heimlich is quite liberal about what counts as abuse. Under the emotional abuse section she includes an anecdote about a young man who was afraid his friends would come to his church and see all the laying on of hands, speaking in tongues and other Pentacostalist goings-on, and that he would be embarrassed. If merely being embarrassing to a child is abuse, then most parents of middle and high schoolers should be in jail - what older child hasn't been embarrassed by his/her parents?Heimlich also includes an anecdote from a young man talking about how Christian rock is so depressing because it focuses on how we are all sinners and not worthy. Like non-Christian rock is so uplifting? Furthermore, the Christian focus on not being worthy is a double message which, when properly understood, is actually greatly uplifting and freeing. Yes, we are all sinners, and none of us measure up to God, but God, in his infinite mercy, loves us anyway. It's permission to let go of perfectionism and focus on love. Certainly some Christian denominations misunderstand or willfully distort that message, and certainly it can edge toward abuse if there is too much focus on the sin half of the message, but the message itself is not inherently abusive.There are similar questionable portions of the sexual abuse and medical abuse sections as well. Ms. Heimlich includes, for instance, ritual abuse under sexual abuse (with a long disclaimer discussing the "satanic panic"). But much of what she describes in this section really wouldn't be considered ritual abuse, and some of it wouldn't even be considered abusive. Some of the stuff about exorcism, for instance, may be odd, possibly uncomfortable and maybe even a bit frightening (but probably no more so than your average Halloween), but most of it is harmless. Additionally, Ms. Heimlich includes male circumcision under medical abuse. I realize there is a large group who believe that circumcision is abusive, but given the popularity of the procedure and the rarity of complications, I think that's a bit of a stretch. In any case, including it, along with some of the other things listed above, dilutes the point and makes it seem as though practically anything a parent does can be abusive.Ultimately, though, my real issue with the book is that it doesn't really say anything, at least not anything new. Is there anyone who is still unaware of the Catholic priest abuse scandal or the child brides of the FLDS? Are people completely unaware of the controversy over spanking, especially "spare the rod, spoil the child"? Who hasn't heard of cases of children being allowed to die of medical neglect in connection with so-called "faith healing"? Anyone unaware of the potential for abuse within the religious setting simply does not want to know of such potential, and this book won't convince anyone.Of course abuse can happen within a religious context. I doubt many people would deny that (although many would deny that it happens within *their* religion). But Ms. Heimlich's case is rather weak that there's a direct link to religion per se. Yes, authoritarian religious households have a higher likelihood for abuse than non-authoritarian households, but how much of that is religion, how much is authoritarianism? There are other ways to be authoritarian besides religion.Don't get me wrong, Ms. Heimlich's point is well taken. Religion, particularly very conservative, authoritarian religion, can provide a framework and justification for abuse, and likewise keep victims isolated from outside sources which could end and/or heal the abuse. Obviously, religious organizations need to be aware of the problem and have procedures in place to prevent abuse and to report and respond to accusations of abuse. Just as obviously, parents shouldn't assume that religious authorities are necessarily any more incorruptible or trustworthy than any other people and they should take the same precautions as they would in any other context. I don't dispute any of that - in fact, I already agreed with all that before I opened this book, as I suspect is the case with most readers. It's not that Ms. Heimlich is preaching anything wrong, it's just that she's preaching to the choir.

"The problem is not Christianity versus Reason." David Alexander, the late author of Star Trek Creator and editor of The Humanist once told me. "It's rational thinking versus magical thinking."I thought of that while reading Breaking Their Will: Shedding Light on Religious Child Maltreatment by Janet Heimlick (yes, daughter of the inventor of the famous maneuver), published by Prometheus Press in 2011. This is simply the best book on religious abuse and the total fundamentalist mindset since Father Leo Booth's When God Becomes A Drug and Alan Peshkin's God's Choice: the total world of a fundamentalist Christian school.Heimlich wisely breaks down her book according to abuses not denominations. Consequently, when you read some of the horrific accounts, you realize the sad but rarely disclosed truth that nearly every religious group has had an encounter with child abuse and its step cousin, collusion.We first acknowledge the reality that Americans have a blind spot when it comes to religion.The book explores the `rod of correction' as used by proponents like Michael Pearl; the inbreeding of the Amish which has brought back diseases not seen since the 19th Century; ritual abuse which, on the surface, might seem misleading since most people associate ritual abuse with suburban satanists.We're talking exorcisms! The casting out of alleged demons. Malnourishment. Beating the devil out of them since corporal punishment will drive away evil spirits!Sexual abuse and cover ups in the IFB (Tina Anderson) are dealt with, as well as scandals in the Jewish Orthodox, Presbyterian (USA), Catholics, Islam, and other faiths. Things certainly appear much worse in Middle Eastern countries where even the suggestion of abuse will result in an honor killing of the accuser.The chapter on circumcision was an eye opener. Female circumcision, as practiced in the United States and Europe, was actually a result of Christians in the Victorian era. The goal being to remove sexual desire from women so they would not stray from their husbands. One of the most disturbing parts of the book is a woman's testimony about how she has never felt sexual desire. She had been strapped to a hospital bed, hands bound, in order to prevent her from masturbating. You call this Purity?Medical neglect on the part of JWs, Seventh Day Adventists, and the Amish are covered. We learn of women whose babies died in childbirth yet are trapped in the womb for days because no one has taken them to the hospital. It turns out the right to refuse medical treatment for your child actually began, not with a grass roots movement, but with heavy lobbying by the Christian Scientists.One of the common maladies children of Christian Science suffer in Breaking Their Will are tumors forming from their eye pockets that grow so big somebody has to balance their head. Medical treatment is still turned down in favor of prayer.Breaking Their Will demonstrates the creative lengths law enforcement currently attempts in order to protect children from abuse and maltreatment. I found it quite interesting how a Utah sheriff went into a polygamous community and put them at ease. The law enforcer said he not going to arrest them for polygamy but wanted to dialogue with them about abuse. Once the community became aware the only concern was for child brides and abuse, they agreed to take the necessary steps to set boundaries and age limits that would not affect their culture.And at the center of it all, lies the abuse embedded in religious belief. Noah molesting his son. Lot having sex with his daughters. Both these characters, to this day, enjoy the reputation of being `just' and `good' men. This holy book has provided the blueprint for the `blame the victim' mindset propagated by many religions. Even God the Father's sacrifice of his Son leads to a familiar quote used by abusers, "God sacrificed his son for us, who are we to balk if he asks to sacrifice ours?"Heimlich goes to great lengths to say that not all religion is abusive. She even states that exorcism, in some cases, might be therapeutic. In my experience, Catholic rituals minus the belief system is BDSM. Yes, that can be therapeutic, but let's not throw abusive religionists a bone.The most popular churches are not liberal churches. They are megachurches! Most popular worship centers hold fast to literal biblical interpretations. If the majority of Americans hold these beliefs, then many of these places are powder kegs of abuse waiting to explode.Churches that do not abuse, most likely, do not take the bible literally like those in Breaking Their Will. Their version of Jesus is most likely as a good teacher who was killed for healing and what he taught. The resurrection is considered symbolic of his message living forever.If our view of Jesus is as the son of an angry God who becomes a sacrificial lamb to save us from his father's wrath, there will always be valid arguments for abusive ministers to keep their flock fearful, silent and enslaved.

Religious education is the bane of the world and children brought up in strict households suffer untold psychological problems. This book details those problems and any intelligent person reading it would be against religious indoctrination at a young age.

Negative and unfairly critical portraying of many of the values and beliefs of basic Christianity.