A Grief Observed

Loved this book! As always, Lewis draws you into his works with authenticity and a sense of candidness. Very personal and spiritual description of grief and suffering well in the Lord.

It opens your perspective that grief, no matter what it came from, everyone experiences those same devastating feelings and that’s what makes it beautiful. I love the raw honesty. It connects God, love, and grief. Why they go hand in hand

Read through the very slender A Grief Observed by C. S. Lewis last night. The book records a brief history of time after the death of C. S. Lewis' wife from cancer. It distinguishes between records and maps of griefs (how can one map grief?), and shines a light on faith and God during pain and suffering. It's a very honest, bare-boned look at ourselves as people and as Christians.The book begins with the death, and Lewis' fear that he is dreaming up an image of his wife, and that the representation is far from the reality. Only, the reality is no longer in existence. Lewis records his numerous discomforts and fears: running into people who don't know what to say, or say what they cannot know (She is with God; She feels no pain), or say the wrong thing (There is no God); addressing his sons only to find that they are ashamed when Lewis mentions their dead mother; fearing where his wife is and what state she is in; dreading the midnight hours. There is one beautiful analogy that he makes between the loss of H. and salt. Grief or anxiety is not skirted because he avoids the cafes or parks they visited together. Her absence is like the absence of salt. If there were no more salt on earth, no more salt at all in any food, one would realize it, one would taste it not only in particular foods, but in every food at every meal.Next, Lewis contemplates the divine. Is God a Cosmic Sadist, or is He wholly good? There are many, many good analogies in here that helped me understand Lewis' process and where he stood in the beginning and at the end. Does God give only to take away out of sadistic pleasure? Lewis claims that God sees that one part of life (Lewis' marriage) comes to fruit and perfection, and moves Christians along to other parts of life in order that through suffering (grief and death), new sanctification is realized. He is not a sadist cutting into the flesh of believers, but rather a skilled surgeon who must continue with all of the incisions in order that the surgery be completed. Otherwise, to finish midway and let off because of the patient's complaints would mean something worse. Nothing is arbitrary, nothing is in vain. And if we see God as dark, wicked, mean, cruel, it is only because we do not see at all, according to Lewis. His great fear is, after all, not that there is no God, but that God is cruel and not what Lewis had understood him to be through Scripture and life.It's interesting because he gives a description of God's response to human grief: silence. He comes to realize that his own panic and terror caused him to run and slam the door in his own face. It's difficult to save a terrified drowning man, he will pull you down. The prayers are screams and it's impossible to hear anything but ourselves. He writes that he realized later that God chooses the right time to give comfort or answers.He also says that "God is the great Iconoclast," who constantly smashes our erroneous images of Himself. We are image makers, we are constantly categorizing and creating representations of things and beings we cannot see (alive, dead, and divine). We want the images, we are afraid to forget. But what we need is the real thing. We want our loved ones back, pictures don't suffice. And, of greater importance, we don't want something that is like Christ, or something like his life, work, death, and resurrection; we need the real thing.(Is it really true that Lewis prayed for the dead? Did he continue after his wife passed?)The last section is devoted mostly to H., his wife, who is really referred to as H. Lewis is highly cognizant of the triptych he creates. He begins with himself, then looks to God, the Creator, and then appreciates his wife, the created, the gift. He closes the record by stating that it will be a part of his life forever, but that H. did say, not to him, but to the chaplain, I am at peace with God.

Our words are our own medicine. Not many 20th Century men dared to unpack the profound sorrow of a late Spring of Love cut short by looming mortality. There was no fault in the stars for C.S. Lewis, but the weight of the Firmament unleashes daily landslides of misery which he details obsessively. But the man is too self-aware to wallow without purpose. He ends up falling forward into Dante, surprised to find Paradiso, not Purgatario. Then there's the sparkling dream/vision/revelation where his Joy reveals herself beyond a name or naming.What could have been merely a fierce reckoning with loss, doubt and despair transfigures into... I don't know what. But with incredible economy of language, Lewis leads you to observe a visitation best described as 'miracle'. One that occurs in a resurrected heart, not some far off nether world where we simply sift through shifting shadows.There's a whole lot packed into 4 sparse chapters, and you'll be highlighting gems on every page...Bram Floria

I had dropped 75lbs in 3 months after my dad passed away. This book saved my life.

CS Lewis, he's a deep thinker and well worth the small investment.

This book is so hard to understand and so very boring.It’s just not for me nor is it helpful for my grieving.

C.S. Lewis at his best. Must like this writer to appreciate the book.