Banished: Surviving My Years in the Westboro Baptist Church Hardcover – Illustrated, March 5, 2013

(crossposted from Goodreads)I devoured this book in about a day. I rarely pay for audiobooks anymore, choosing, generally, to get them for free on Overdrive. But after reading "Unfollow: A Journey from Hatred to Hope" by Megan Phelps-Roper, I just had to read this book. Lauren brings kind of an outsider (non-Phelps) perspective to the WBC story. I'm glad she got away from the WBC and decided to tell her story. In comparing and contrasting her book with Megan's, I do think Megan is more likeable and sympathetic. Lauren verges on insincere at times. I believe her story. But, understandably, her story is spun from her perspective, casting her as a perpetual victim and others as villains. Her father is a villain. I don't doubt that. And Lauren is a victim. She was brought in to the church as a child. She had no say over whether she got to go there and she certainly couldn't leave before adulthood. As with Megan's family, I hope Lauren's family escapes the WBC someday and reunites with her. Her father... I think he's a pretty bad egg. He's the most alpha beta I've ever heard of. He NEEDS to be in submission to someone even as he craves power over others. I hope the day comes when he's the only remaining member of the WBC. But who knows, maybe he'll see the light someday and leave the church. Hopefully he won't latch on to another extremist group.

This is not an expose, it is Lauren's memoir. This is not an in-depth account with interviews and researched second-hand information, it is her experiences and observations. That doesn't necessarily make it any less informational, it just wasn't what I initially expected. A few random thoughts...- It is a bit slow at times, though other parts I couldn't put it down.- I did get frustrated at her insecurities at times, though at least she was up front and admitted them. She didn't try to rationalize them.- I do believe that if she had never been banished, or would have been allowed back in shortly thereafter, she'd be in now and this book would never have been written. However, at this point, I do not believe she would ever go back now if the chance were presented.- Her father... where do I start? I almost felt like he was the bigger villain than Fred Phelps himself. Her father fancied himself a lion, but was in reality nothing but a sheep subconsciously willing to latch onto any person with a stronger personality than his. He really set himself up to be a 'tool' of the church, in every intent of the term.- Fred Phelps actually doesn't play prominently in the book, as she didn't have much direct interaction with him. She did, however, have a great deal of interaction with his daughter Shirley who pretty much runs the church anyway.- I have to admit that I was grudgingly impressed by the church's attention to detail and internal self-discipline.- On the flips side, it was repugnant how controlling and paranoid and hypocritical the inner circle family members are. Then again, that really shouldn't come as a surprise.All in all, a good read, very informative, worthwhile, but not quite 5-star worthy. I give it 4 stars.

This is a well-written autobiography. Just like a in great play, you can see the foreshadowing of the fissures that will eventually rupture Lauren's world, as her family and church gradually shift and crack. As a real-life drama, this is a deep insight into the many ways the human mind adapts and even warms to indoctrination and control by fear. My only regret is that Lauren had had more time in this book to describe the "after": although she describes briefly her new viewpoints of faith and life, I would have loved to hear more of how she dealt with the dissonances and losses that she's processed. Still, great read!

A fascinating look into the Westboro "Baptist" "Church" and how one family became sucked into it, ultimately banishing their own daughter (Lauren's family is not related to the Phelps by blood or marriage). Lauren's story starts with her own childhood and life before her family moved to Topeka and joined this group, details that prove to be very insightful and important as her story progresses. Her writing style is very simple, straightforward but sufficiently descriptive. Although frequent readers of memoirs will probably find it unimpressive, for me the subject matter was fascinating enough to suck me in. Lauren is self-perceptive and honest, and does her best to explain "what was going through her head," and the book will give you a whole new appreciation for the power of social acceptance and peer pressure. Although I would hate to be her parents or the church and have details shared about me such that she shares in her book, it is still a scintillating, rare opportunity to get on the inside of this cult and what makes them tick. For a few brief (VERY brief) moments, I found myself coveting what she had there at the beginning. She describes this doting new family that bent over backwards to help her and make her feel welcome (though that didn't last) and a close-knit, well-organized community in which even the children have jobs to do that are done without complaint. If you are at all interested in this group and why they do what they do, Lauren's book will suck you in and help you understand. My own reading of it included an extra dose of surrealism because I live in the same town as the Phelps and daily drive past some of the places she mentions.I have two minor critiques of the book. One, there were a few times in her storytelling where the described changes in someone's beliefs or behavior--especially her dad's--seems so abrupt that it's hard to believe its total veracity. Perhaps it was because of the need to shorten stories for brevity. But number two, there are a few moments of seeming inconsistencies in the book. At one point, she mentions that she actually felt she had more freedoms in the church than her previous home, but then literally a few pages later she is talking about how controlling and repressive everything was. Having said that, I'm disappointed with some of the negative reviews I've read. One person said that Lauren comes across as a whiny, boy-crazy teenager, which I did not find true at all (although her short section on the boy interests of her and her friends was the most boring). Another review expressed dismay that she is still a Christian and blasted her for not abandoning belief in God, a critique that can only come from someone who thinks Westboro speaks for all of us or that there is no fundamental difference between them and another Baptist church down the street. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

Many surprising facts crop up in this chilling narrative. Westboro, despite the enormous publicity it gets in the media, is surprisingly small and - not quite literally - inbred. This is at once a moral tale of how dogma, however hateful, can seize total control over a small group of people, once convinced; and, at the same time, the first-person narrative of an innocent, well intentioned young woman who finds herself, for no obvious reason, the object of what almost amounts to a modern-day witch hunt.

Very interesting read, fascinating to see how the joining of a cult happens to a whole family.

I have always had a morbid interested in this fanatical group and Lauren's book gives good insight into their ways. Obviously it's written from her viewpoint but it's quite balanced - unlike the WBC!

Great read, came fast and the book is thoroughly engaging.Definetely recommend.

Very good read